Thursday, June 19, 2008

"Oh, Pep."

So, funny thing happened to me today. I tell ya, it's a very odd feeling to be trapped in a confined space. You may be thinking of elevators, where normal people get stuck. Nope. Think bathroom.

First I should tell you that I am staying at my aunt's house in Minneapolis at the moment, trying to find a job. So I am getting ready to shower this morning, and there was that odd moment when you are using someone else's shower when you wonder, Should I lock the outer door? What if someone needs to come in just to use the outer space? They know I'm showering, they wouldn't walk in here... The debate goes on, but you catch my drift. So I decide (yes, I made a decision) that I should just close the inner door. And I find that it locks! And then I find that it does not unlock and will not open. Mmmmm fun.

I took my shower, because if you think about it, they are more likely to go looking for me if they hear that I finished my shower and am still not out yet. Then I just sat and waited. I tried banging on the door a few times and yelling out names, but they couldn't hear me. I could hear them, but they couldn't hear me.

So I was just waiting until I hear someone walk up the stairs, and I am proud to say that I was rather calm. I rationalized that I wouldn't be stuck in there more than a day, someone would have to use that bathroom at some point. Plus, when you think about it, I was locked in the best place to survive for a long time. Think about it, you've got a toilet to use, and you've got water to drink from the bath faucet. You couldn't really eat anything in there, but you could survive quite a while in there. I was trying to think of something in there that would be edible, and I found myself wondering, What would Survivor Man do? I can just see it now. You know he would make it all dramatic. He would probably find some "extremely rare edible lotion," or wrap a damp bath towel around his head to keep cool.

I seriously did wonder about running out of oxygen at one brief point. Stupid, I know, but it was pretty humid and hard to breathe in there after I had showered. You always see them worry about oxygen in movies when they get trapped in a space. I wondered how long it would take to run out. It would be such a weird way to go. The paper would read, "Girl, 22, just graduated college and about to embark on the rest of her life, and had just arrived in Minneapolis to become a successful human being, died yesterday after accidentally locking herself in a bathroom." Life can be ironic like that. Have I told you I was hit by a Hummer a few days after my 21st birthday? Yeah.

Of course, it never came to that. I couldn't have been waiting more than half an hour before my aunt came upstairs and heard me. She didn't even have to call a locksmith or anything, she just got a screwdriver and jimmied it open. Anti-climatic, I know.

But hey, I can now add Trapped in Closed Space to things I have survived. When you think about it, it's interesting how much we live through. Sure, some hardships/dangers seem minor, but practically anything you do could be life-threatening. I mean, I've flown in planes more times than I can count on my fingers and toes. In the end, we do okay. It kind of makes you question fear, and the way we sometimes let it control our lives. It's a stretch, but my bathroom story comes with a moral: "The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all." Wise words spoken by the dad in Princess Diaries.

(If you continue to keep up with me, you may look forward to hearing many stories like this. I tend to get myself into weird situations. My friends in Lubbock would respond to a story like this with an "Oh, Pep." They're used to it.)